So I guess we’ve all seen the Paris Hilton video where she responds to that “wrinkly white haired dude” John McCain? If you haven’t Knight posted it yesterday.
As I said in comments on Kinght’s blog yesterday I thought that video was pretty funny. And I’m one of the few people I know who will actually say that I think Paris is beautiful. But, she’s not sexy.
See, you gotta have brains to be sexy and Paris is stooooopid. Really, really stupid. You also have to have a sense of humor to be sexy and you also can’t have a sense of humor if you are stupid. Okay, maybe you can, but not a good one. So Paris loses out completely.
But, that isn’t really what I was going to talk about concerning that video.
How much of a geek does it make me if right after watching the Paris for Prez video, I said “Pffffft .. She can’t run for President. You gotta be 35 years old. And Rihanna can’t be her running mate cause not only is she not 35 either, she’s not even a native born American. Sheesh!”
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Ok, so now let’s deal with the other bimbo that was in that McCain ad. Now this one has really got me fired up!
Britney Spears has apparently been offered the role of Varla in a remake of the 1965 cult film “Faster Pussycat! Kill! Kill!” That is Quintin Tarantino’s latest project.
Now, I know this is a remake, but that doesn’t change the fact that I proposed an idea very similar to this more than a year ago. Yes, my idea was for Britney to be a superhero and in this movie she would be a totally whacked out freak (type casting) who is a murderer. But, she is still going to be a stripper which was really the whole idea of the move. Britney playing a stripper and getting nekked a lot.
And yes, in this movie Brit would also be a lesbian, but that’s not really that much different from my idea either. I mean, if Brit is a stripper then it’s pretty much understood that she is at least bi-sexual, right? Hell, every stripper I’ve ever met was bi, so I just assumed Brit’s character would be too.
You know, it’s funny. Every single stripper who has ever come over and sat down next to me has pointed to some outrageously hot girl who was on stage and said “that’s my girlfriend up there.” I always thought that was odd that I ALWAYS had that kind of timing. Get the girl on stage’s girlfriend to sit with me every single time. I know some people have told me that the girls do that just to get the idea of them and another hot girl together in my mind and then I will want lap dances or whatever. But, that’s a pretty cynical view of these really sweet girls who are just trying to work their way through college, so I refuse to accept that. I just think I have unique timing.
Anyway, I’m not saying that Quintin Tarantino saw my blog post about making a Britney a superhero stripper who kills bad people like Ben Affleck, and thought “that’s brilliant” and then decided to do this remake so he could use her as a stripper who kills whoever she kills in this movie.
Oh wait ...
Yes I am!
I’m so getting a lawyer.
I want royalties.
Or a part in the movie.
Or to be invited to the premiere.
Or at a very minimum to be invited to the post premiere party where Britney and any other chicks who play lesbian strippers show off some of their stripper moves.
Ok, I’ll settle for going to strip clubs with Britney as she learns how to do stripper dancing and how to be bisexual.
Is that really asking too much?
Come on dude, it's the least you can do since I still pimp Reservoir Dogs as a bad ass movie and never said a bad word about Grindhouse.
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