At The Fur Post With A What Down His What???

The madcap adventures of LaFawnda got me thinking about Flint and his novel o' romance that I was given two years ago and still have not had the time to read as I am not 70 years old - thus not yet in my season of gardening and porn. But I did take 7 minutes yesterday to flip through and see what nuggets I could mine.



Oh, Sweet Mama. Are you ready for this..?



"Then teeth began to tease her nipple, and a tongue laved the swollen tip a moment before drawing it into the mouth again to slowly suckle it..."



I had to look up the word "Laved." It either means "to wash; bathe" or "to ladle; pour or dip with a ladle." I'm thinking he didn't dip her nip with a ladle. Rather he washed the tip of her nip with his lip. Much better.



"When he had her so worked up that she was thrashing her head about, he slid his palm inside the bottom of her underwear and cupped the soft mound between her legs. With his middle finger, he probed the tender..."



Seriously, that one is kinda hot.



"Cupping her small rear in his hands, he rocked slowly against her, each thrust of his body going in a little deeper. It took about five minutes before blond hair and black were meshed together."



Okay, I'm thinking that five minutes is a freaking long time for the entering stage - no matter how virginal the virgin. I would have gone to the kitchen and made some soup by the time blond and black hair finally meshed. And then I would have thrown it up because, Eeeeewwwwww.



"When she made no move to take his member into her hand, he curled her fingers around his largeness. She had a right to know how big he was..."



I gotta say that every time I read the word "member," yes even when referring to a penis, all I can picture is a Mormon man in a suit. Mormonism made it's mark on my brain long before "Where Did I Come From?" even had a chance. Therefore a Penis is a Member in a Suit and a Vagina is a Jeans Wearing, Tequila Swilling Non-Member. I guess that sounds about right.



"...hadn't she had proof of that when she saw him at the fur post with a whore's hand down his pants."



BEST LINE EVER.



You want to know the very best part about these saucy passages? They were written by This Woman...





Bah-hahahahahahaha!!!



How Totally Awesome Is That??? Makes me think I might be doing more than just reading porn when I'm seventy.



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