Free Love

I recently read a blog post that made me stop. And think. And then want to go skydiving. The topic was "Sexual Liberation," something the author of said blog said they "experimented" with the idea of but ultimately rejected because sexual liberation "disconnects sexuality and sexual expression from any affective, relational or spiritual context. It ultimately denies the reality of the non-physical, and denies the validity of any meaning connected to sex apart from simple physical gratification... [and] can feel liberating -- at first. But ultimately it's not any sort of liberation at all. It eventually becomes a form of slavery, condemning us to an impoverished existence, and stripping our lives of humanity and meaning."

I wanted to cry. True sexual liberation doesn't imprison, condemn and strip life of meaning - it does exactly the opposite. To liberate, by definition, means to "to set free, as from imprisonment or bondage." If one is sexually liberated that means that one was previously sexually imprisoned, held captive or bound in a restrictive way. It means that one was shackled by sexual guilt, shame, ignorance and fear brought on by the effects of religious dogma, sexual abuse or crippling family and social beliefs and expectations.

To be liberated means to be set free. How can that ever be a bad thing? When we are truly free, in any and all areas of life, we are bigger, better, healthier, happier, more generous, more courageous, more loving. And, yes, we are more responsible. I know that there are those out their wielding sex like a weapon to inflict pain on themselves and others. Just because one has lots of sex doesn't mean that one is liberated. Clearly those individuals are not free from their own ties that bind. I know that there are those that have joyless sex disconnected from all feeling. But, again, those people are not liberated from anything. They are just as held hostage by their sexual wounds and fractures as the person who denies themselves sexual experience and expression.

In my opinion, sexual liberation (and every other form of freedom) is something we should all seek after like the Holy Grail. We should all desire freedom from the prisons we build for ourselves and one another. And we should fight hard to remove every shackle we wear because then, and only then, are we able to be truly present, truly healthy, truly responsible and truly charitable and kind.

Only when we are free can we truly connect with our deepest selves and with one another.

Only when we are free can we truly enjoy the incredible power and life giving joy of healthy sexual expression.

And only when we are free are we truly alive.

In the name of Aphrodite (and Dr. Ruth)... Amen.

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Related Posts
Battle Cries Of The Sexually Dysfunctional: Part I
Battle Cries Of The Sexually Dysfunctional: Part II