Pasta and Country Music...

A couple of very interesting and important questions that need to be answered so that you can learn more about me that you never needed to know and don’t give a shit about:

Gary asked:

OK, big question for you to write about next time: where do you stand on PASTA? Do you like just spaghetti or maybe crazy corkscrews or zitis or raviolis and what kinda sauce, like tomato or cream or veggie or with meatballs or sausage or what about pasta salad too????

Excellent question!  I am a big fan of pasta.  All different kinds too.  Spaghetti, fettuccine, bow-tie, elbow macaroni, twisted spirals, the kind with grooves in them so the sauce sticks to the pasta better. I love it all.  Except maybe angel hair cause I’m not sure what part of the angel that hair came from cause it’s just too thin and gets all bunched up.

As for sauces I prefer the red sauces.  I’m okay with white sauces sometimes, but you gotta be careful with those.  If they’re bad you can have a raging case of flaming asshole for the whole night.  Yes, you do have to be sure that your red sauce isn’t too spicy, but I don’t usually have that problem.

I do NOT do veggie lasagna or veggie spaghetti though.  I like meat.  I’m good with half turkey and half ground beef though.  Or turkey, ground beef and some sausage in there.  AND, I will do just the red sauce and the spaghetti pasta.  That’s pretty yummy if the sauce is good. 

Also, just some good old mac & cheese (the .39 cent Always Save or Great Value box from the store) and mix in some hamburger meat is always pretty tasty. 

Or, if you prefer, you can mix in some chicken and broccoli (or asparagus) into your mac & cheese.  And maybe sprinkle some bread crumbs over the top of it, then put it into the oven to brown up the bread crumbs and serve it with garlic bread and a nice merlot.



But even though I don’t do vegetarian, a cold, crisp salad does go nicely with pasta meals.  However, when it comes to salads I am, not surprisingly, pretty basic.  Lettuce, shredded carrots, ham, some pepperonis, shredded cheese, bacon bits and sexy French babes dressing.  I’m good with mixing some fresh spinach into my salad too. And a basic vinegar and oil house dressing is usually acceptable too.

But, I’ll pass on other veggies like cauliflower, broccoli, that stuff that looks like grass, as well as chicken, fish, nasty cheeses and basically any gross dressing that people come up with.



Okay, Farmer’s Wife also had a very important question:

“I know you don't really care for country music.  But, say you were tied to a chair in a room with nothing but surround sound and your captor would release you after forcing you to a listen to one country music song for 24 hours played over and over again.  What song would you choose and why?”

So here’s the deal.  I don’t really consider most of what’s called country music today to be real country music.  It’s mostly bad pop music.  But, if you’re talking about people like Patsy Cline, Johnny Cash, Willie Nelson and others from back in the day?  Now THAT’S real country music. 

First of all, in this situation I’m going to assume that while I’m tied to that chair I will be getting a lap dance from country music star Miranda Lambert.  Right?



Yes? Thanks. 

If I’m getting the lap dance from Miranda, I’ll go with “Shook Me All Night Long” by AC/DC … what?  Ohhhhhhh Yeah.  That really isn’t a country song, is it?  Damn.

How about “I Touch Myself” by The Divinyls?

No? Okay then I’ll probably go with “Folsom Prison Blues” by Johnny Cash cause I freaking love him and that’s pretty much my favorite song of his.