Outdoor Football, The Post Office, DADT and I'm With Stupid ...

I'm sure by now you guys have all seen the video of the collapse of the Metrodome last Sunday morning in Minneapolis. Well, since the roof can't be repaired by this week, the Vikings will have to play their game against the Bear this week at the Univ. of Minnesota's OUTDOOR stadium.

And, if you listen to the talking heads on ESPN, you'd think there was never an NFL game played outside EVER! I hate to break this to some people, but they play NFL games outdoors in places like Green Bay, Pittsburgh, Chicago, New England, Cleveland and Canada Buffalo. I'm pretty sure this one can be played in Minneapolis without too much incident.

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Speaking of the NLF. Why is that coaches don't hesitate to go for it on 4^th and anywhere from 1 to 3 yards if they are on the opponents 38 to 25 yard line, but NEVER go for it on 4^th and 1 inside the opponents 10 yard line? Drives me crazy. Worst thing that happens is you don't make it and force the other team to go 90+ yards. Seems like a no-brainer to me.

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Okay, politics...

They are, once again, about to vote on the repeal of Don't Ask Don't Tell. And once again, there are republicans saying publicly that they intend to vote “yes” on repeal. But, we all know what's going to happen. They're gonna make up some bullshit reason that the democrats are being mean to them, and then all end up voting “no” and keeping the bill from going to a final vote. Happens every time. And it'll happen again this time.

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I went to the post office on Monday to mail a package of presents to my sister. I walked in and headed straight to the area where the self-help area to use the automated checkout to send my package. But, it wasn't there! And the line was looooooooooong. So I had to leave and go back later.

When I went back there were only three people in line. Of course, the post office made up for this by only having one window open. Anyway, I finally got up there and asked the guy where the self-help machine went.

PO Guy: “To Jonesboro”

Me: “Why?”

PO Guy: “They don't have them for every post office and they decided to move ours to a bigger office.”

Me: “Was it just too efficient and making things too easy?”

PO Guy: “Yeah.”

Then he weighed my box and all that stuff ..

PO Guy: “We can get it there on Wed. Guaranteed for $42.90”

Me: “Is that in Pesos??”

PO Guy: “Well, we can also send it for $11.00 and it's estimated to get there on Wed. but no guarantees.”

Me: “But, it'll be there by Christmas Eve”

PO Guy: “We can't guarantee that sir.”

Me: “You can't get this little ole package to Omaha, NE in 10 business days? Should I use UPS?”

PO Guy: “I'm sure it'll get there no problem.”

My sister got it on Wednesday.

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Check out the light display this dude put up on his camper that he has set up at a trailer park just down the road from me. I think the lights cost more than his home...

(clickr for biggr in Flickr)

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Aaaaaaaaaaaaand don't forget, Thursday night at 11 pm EST is “I'm With Stupid.” This week, it's Matt and Jay Raw! We've got a live remote from the Sun Bowl in El Paso, TX, a new Christmas song from Matt-Man and Matt-Man has an “interview” with his Ex!! You DON'T wanna miss that!

We also have some previews of some college bowl games you might not have ever heard of and .. well, the rest of the show will just be Matt and Jay going wherever the wind takes them. There's just no telling what we'll come up with. I might even talk about my Amish Girlfriend who isn't actually Amish cause that stuff confuses me.

Anyway, it's gonna be a great time so tune in and call in if you feel like it!!!

Oh and as a little preview for next week, start writing up your lists of grievances because next week on the 23^rd we'll be holding Festivus!!

Let's See if I Can Get Some Hate Mail ....

Speaking of Carrie Prejean, I’ve stayed away from the Miss California story because I think there are many sides to it and it doesn’t lend itself to a simple conclusion. Of course we all know that it all started when one of the most despicable pieces of human debris, Perez Hilton, asked Miss California about her position on gay marriage during the Miss USA pageant. She said she was agin it and that set off arguments all over the country and brought Carrie Prejean more fame and fortune that she ever dreamed of.

To make a long story short, Ms Prejean then became the ultimate victim claiming that she would have won Miss USA had she given the “politically correct” answer and then almost lost her Miss Cali crown and then just last week was finally fired and forced to give up her crown. And she is now a HERO to the anti-gay marriage crowd, is getting HUGE speaking fees to go and speak to right-wing groups, and will probably have both a book deal and a show on Fox News soon.

Good job Perez.

My take on the whole thing, and I’m sure you’ve been wondering about that, is that the question asked by the Dirt Bag was unfair. Nobody else had to answer any political questions or questions about any other hot button issues. And the whole thing backfired on Hilton because he has created a monster. As for getting fired, I think Prejean deserved it because of her breach of contract. I also think she wanted to get fired.

Prejean is a quick learner. She realized that getting fired by the Miss USA people would allow her to become another professional victim and that would give her even more attention and it would give her even “credibility” with the haters out there. This has all played out perfectly for her and her desires for fame (or infamy) and fortune. Prejean now joins many other professional victims like Hillary Clinton, Sarah Palin, Al Sharpton, Jesse Jackson, Mike Huckabee, Bill Donahue and the list goes on and on and on.

While I completely disagree with Carrie, I think this whole incident has hurt the pro-marriage crowd. It has made them look mean, petty and intolerant themselves. In a battle for hearts and minds, you can’t go out of your mind in anger at one insignificant person and lose sight of the big picture.

And while people on the left are constantly admonishing people on the right for the intolerance and meanness, they can’t just sit back and let people like Perez Hilton spew their own brand of meanness and hatred go unchecked.



Which brings us to this ...

If I were advising the republican party, and again, they would be soooooooo much better off if they would listen to me, I would tell them to drop the official party opposition to gay marriage AND that some republicans should introduce a measure in congress to do away with Don't Ask, Don't Tell.

Yes I know this would cause the right wing of the republican party to go completely bonkers. But, if you haven't noticed, those people have been going bonkers since Nov 4, 2008. This really wouldn't be anything new. And yes, I know that elected republicans live in mortal fear of Rush and Ann Coulter and the rest of the professional conservatives, but in the long run taking these positions will be a plus for the repubs.

First of all, they will be joining with the rest of the mainstream on these issues. I know they talk all the time about "keeping the base excited," but the reality is they need to get some independents and moderates excited sometime too. And, the truth is they will finally be able to publicly take the position that most of them believe in private.

And the best thing that would happen for the republicans if they would do what I say??

They would be able to call the smug, holier-than-thou democrats’ bluff on these issues.

See, the dems love to talk a big game about gay marriage and DADT and that stuff, but they don't seem to motivated to actually do anything about them do they? That's because they have been able to use the strangle hold the haters on the far right have on the republican party as cover for THEIR OWN bigotry. Although I think Obama has been a coward on DADT and gay marriage, there really wasn't ever any reason to think Obama would do anything other that what he has done on these issues.

I've always said that the people who were opposed to gay marriage and gays in the military are on the losing side of history. And, they see that. That's why they are so desperately holding on right now. If the republicans would come out in support of repealing DADT and at least drop their official party position against gay marriage, then they could put the democrats, and Obama, on the losing side of these issues too.

And republicans, wouldn't it be nice to win one every once in a while?


Since you skimmed had to read through all that here’s a pic of Sarah Chalke who I would go lesbian for if I were a chick…