Random Stuff for a Random Thursday...

Here's an excerpt from Snooki's new book: 

“For exercise, Gia cranked house music in her bedroom and danced until her legs felt numb. She loved dancing and was talented, too. Gia won a contest while in high school for shaking it the longest and hardest without spilling a single drop of her vodka tonic.
Tonight, she aimed her gyrating hips straight at Salami Boy. The guy could take a hint. In two seconds, he creeped over to her. In five seconds, they were grinding, her butt pressed against his thighs.
She turned around to introduce herself. “I’m Gia,” she screamed in his ear above the music.
“Rocky,” he said, putting a bear paw on her waist and holding her against him.
Rocky in his jeans, thought Gia.”



Step aside Cormac McCarthy and someone notify the Pulitzer Committee!



Also, how is that we're so concerned about our cheeeldrin's sensibilities that we're removing the words “nigger” and “injun” from the next printing of “Adventures of Huckleberry Finn” but we'll let them read this shit from a disgusting piece of human debris like Snooki?

America. Just. Fucking. Stop it.

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Inside The Actors Studio

1. What is your favorite word? Kerfuffle
2. What is your least favorite word? No
3. What turns you on? Sense of humor
4. What turns you off? Arrogance and snobbery
5. What sound do you love? Rolling thunder and rain
6. What sound do you hate? Children screaming
7. What is your favorite curse word? GAWD DAMMIT!!
8. What profession other than yours would you like to attempt? Sports Writer
9. What profession would you not like to do? Fluffer
10. If heaven exists, what would you like to hear God say when you arrive at the pearly gates?
“Oh don't look so surprised!”

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In other news I won BOTH the ABL AND Open Bar Fantasy Football Leagues this year!

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And last but not least, it's almost time for another fun-filled hour of hilarity on “I'm With Stupid” This Thursday at 11 pm EST, Matt-Man and I will be discussing our favorite Twitter and Blog hotties. Oh yeah, if this doesn't get us a couple of restraining orders, nothing will!

In addition to that Kim Fragile will be there with a live remote from Schmoop's uterus, we will preview an exciting new BTR show AAAAAAAAAAAND …. are you sitting down? We have an interview with the President of the United States Barack Obama!!

You don't wanna miss this folks!!