I love that late game. It's like a special extra treat after a great day of football. I don't know if everyone gets this kind of deal. But, here at 9:30 pm we can usually turn it over to FSN and catch a Pac-10 game which usually won't end until around 1 am. That makes 14 straight hours of football. And sometimes, even if there isn't a Pac-10 game to catch and FSN is showing stoopid baseball, Versus will show late games out west. Like this week it's Wisconsin vs UNLV.
Excellent!
And I make no apologies whatsoever for watching all of it.
People have hobbies. Some people play golf. Some people run. Others love to do home repairs and/or gardening work on the weekends in the fall. I watch college football. And, some NFL too. But, mostly I prefer the college game.
So, I decided to bring back Football Saturdays and pick games against the spread again this year. Next week, I'll add select NFL games also.
*Disclaimer: I don't know what I'm talking about and have never and will never present myself as any kind of authority on either gambling or the game of football. So, if you are such a desperate fucking degenerate that you will use the picks of some random, probably intoxicated guy on the blogosphere, then you deserve all the terrible things that happen to you in life. Enjoy living in your van down by the river and dining on the yummy soup served every evening at the Salvation Army loser.
Okay, it's not easy to make picks on opening weekend because we don't know much about the teams yet and so many of the better teams play cupcakes who they'll blow out but might not cover. But, I think we can scrape up a few games worth making picks on.
Home team in caps, my pick in bold:
Northwestern -3 over VANDERBILT ... Holy crap! How many spoiled, over-privileged douche bags can fit on one football field? We'll find out in this game.
OKLAHOMA ST. -14 over Washington St ... Stillwater is a long ways to travel to just to end up getting an ass whipping. But, Washington St. is used to it, so it's okay
LSU -10 over North Carolina ... This game is actually being played in Atlanta. It doesn't matter though. They could play it in the country of Georgia and the results would be the same.
Boise St -1 over VIRGINIA TECH ... This game is actually being played in D.C. What the hell? Doesn't anyone ever play at home anymore? They spend hundreds of millions of dollars on their damn stadiums and then they play "home" games somewhere else. Makes no fucking sense. Also, I'm only picking Boise because everyone is slobbering all over them so much. I hope they get beat by 100 and everyone shuts the fuck up. I'm starting to hate Boise St.
College story...
When I was in college at Arkansas, they sold soft drinks in these 24 ounce plastic cups for like $17.37 or so. Anyway, we would always get one because the tradition was that after Arkansas scored a TD we would throw the cups. I know, it was silly, but whatever.
Anyway, we were playing Tulsa and had them down and were just stomping on them. The cups had been flying all over the place. After Arkansas' 13th touchdown or so, I grabbed a cup, stood up tall and threw a perfect spiral from about the middle of the stands all the way to the Tulsa bench. It landed right behind a player who turned around and looked at then looked up at the stands.
I'm pretty sure about 7,936 students stopped what they were doing and pointed at me and said "He did it!" Okay, maybe not, but it felt like it.
The next week the school announced that they wouldn't tolerate any more cup throwing after Arkansas touchdowns. And, that's how I killed an Arkansas Football tradition.
Okay, you know I just don't really like most games this week, so I'm not going to pick anymore. The key to gambling (editor's note: Gambling is bad, mkay?) is to only pick the games you have a good feeling about. Oh what the hell ...
NOTRE DAME -10 over Purdue ... Every year the "experts" try to tell me that Purdue is going to be "tough" or "scrappy" or "hard to beat" and every year they're shitty. They're gonna be extra shitty this year. I hope.
BYU -3 over Washington ... I really don't know if I have anymore Mormon jokes in me. But, I promise to work on some and try them out as the year goes on.
Okay, that's really all I'm picking this week. I mean, I'm pretty sure Missouri is going to cover 12 points against Illinois, but I also have reservations about the Tigers. And I'm not picking THREE "neutral location" games. Seriously, people. Play your home games at home so the students can go. Fuckers.
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