What To Do If You Have A Racist Cock ...

So, have you seen this moronic statement from singer/songwriter/douchebag John Mayer?   He was asked by Playboy magazine if black women throw themselves at him like white women do.  Here’s his answer…


"I don't think I open myself to it. My d*ck is sort of like a white supremacist. I've got a Benetton heart and a f*ckin' David Duke c*ck."


See folks?  John isn’t a racist at all.  But, his dick is.  He loves black women, but his dick isn’t interested.  When he sees a beautiful black woman, his heart and mind say “WOW!” But, his dick runs and hides.  It’s just not his fault.

So, here is possibly the worst stick figure cartoon of John Mayer ever…


Yeah, I’m witty.  Actually credit for the concept of John wearing a little KKK hood over his “Little John” goes to my friend Annie from Annie & Burl Live.  Annie says I’m a sick fuck.  I think she’s projecting a bit when she does that.

Anyway, I’m guessing that John never gets this ad on his Facebook page that I get all the time…


And you know what?  My dick doesn’t run and hid from that ad.  My dick says “Hey! Check that ad out dude! Do it! Cliiiiiiiiiiiiiiick that ad!!”  He’s kinda pushy like that.



Oh, one other thing that I thought of.  Hello!! Business opportunity…

“Hey folks, John Mayer here.  Are you like me in that you love black women but have a white supremacist dick?  Well, I have the perfect product for you.  Developed in the Cynical Bastard World Laboratories specifically for people like me:

The KKKondom! 

That’s right kids.  Now you don’t have to worry about your dick being afraid of black women.  Just slip on the “hoodie” and get after it.  You’ll protect your dick while still enjoying the wonders of making love to a black woman.  Your dick will never be afraid of black women again.  And when you get asked about having sex with black women, you’ll be able to say ‘Hell yeah!’ and nobody will ever know the truth. 

Call it sensitivity training for your cock.  And here’s a bonus:  It works perfect for dicks that are afraid of Asian, Hispanic, Native American and EVEN Jewish women too!  Pretty much any minority woman your dick might be afraid of. 

So, go ahead, call 1-800-KKK-COCK and get your supply of KKKondoms today!”