It’s Wordzzle time again. As usual Raven is our lovely and talented host. You know how this works, we get ten words for the Big Wordzzle and five words for the Mini-Wordzzle. Then if we want to we can combine them all into a Mega Wordzzle.
Big Wordzzle words are Cardboard Box, Liquor Cabinet, Ostrich Feathers, Longitudinal, Hamburger Helper, Partnership, Laundry Detergent, Magnificent, San Francisco, Prognosis
Mini-Wordzzle words are Worst Case Scenario, Marginalia, Water Fountain, Specialized, Fortitude
Here we go with the big Wordzzle...
I knew it! I would recognize the sound of the longitudinal engine in a UPS truck anywhere. They delivered to me a magnificent cardboard box from The “Ostrich Feathers Partnership and Variety Store” in San Francisco. Inside was my order for Tofu and Turkey Hamburger Helper, Save the Earth All-Natural Spring Fresh Laundry Detergent and a bottle of Cabernet Sauvignon for my liquor cabinet. The prognosis for this weekends party looks good.
Mini-Wordzzle...
The worst case scenario would be for me to drop my copy of “Specialized Fortitude: How to Stand Up to Internet Trolls” into the water fountain and smear all the marginalia.
And for the Mega I will continue my Vader in Vegas series.
How the Mighty Have Fallen Part VIII
Part I
Part II
Part III
Part IV
Part V
Part VI
Part VII
Vader was up early as usual. He exited the bathroom and paused for a moment to look at Pandora as she lay there longitudinally across his bed with her head resting comfortably on his expensive ostrich feather pillow. He decided to just let her sleep, rather than wake her and send her on her way, even though he was ready for her leave. He normally specialized in one night stands, but he wasn’t sure what to do with Pandora.
As Vader walked towards the kitchen he stopped and opened the blinds. The first thing he noticed was that some kids had once again put laundry detergent in the big water fountains in front of the building. He laughed as he thought it took a certain amount of intestinal fortitude for them to keep doing this, what with all the cameras and security around.
Pandora suddenly appeared at the door. “Morning you magnificent man you!” She purred as she stood there naked and smiling at Vader. “Good morning to you too” Vader responded. “If you hungry there might be something in the fridge.”
Pandora walked into the kitchen and opened the fridge and found a container of some leftover Hamburger Helper which she tossed into the microwave and started to heat up. While she did this Vader grabbed some supplies from the liquor cabinet and make a “breakfast margarita” for himself. Pandora said she’d just have Pepsi.
Vader then opened up his laptop to check his email and saw that he had an email from Tiffany.
“My Uncle Ernie is in the hospital in San Francisco and the prognosis isn’t very good. I’m flying out today. I was wondering if you could fly up and meet me there? Maybe we could spend some time together.”
“Hmm ... Very strange. Seems as though something has gone wrong.” He said. “What’s that babe?” asked Pandora. “Oh nothing” Vader said quickly. “Just a little glitch in a business partnership I have with someone from out of town. If she’s not careful she’s gonna end up living in a cardboard box.”
Vader was deep in though when Pandora sat down at the table with him. When he looked up he saw her reading his marginalia that he had written on the pages of his copy of “Worst Case Scenario” and he suddenly realized she was still naked.
“I’ll have to spray that chair down with some Lysol after she leaves” he thought to himself.
Then The Dark Lord suddenly had an idea.
“Have you ever been to San Francisco?”
Showing posts with label Darth Vader. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Darth Vader. Show all posts
Saturday, July 19, 2008
Saturday, July 5, 2008
I Never Met a Wordzzle I Didn't Like ...
Can you believe it’s already Wordzzle time again? Amazing huh?
You know how this all works. Raven gives us the words and we make up the stories. And I’m still going with my Darth Vader in Vegas story.
So this weeks Big Wordzzle words are Handy, Operation, Gratitude, Parallel Bars, The Color Purple, Manic Depressive, Puget Sound, Fragmentary, Perpetual Motion and Secretive.
And the Mini Wordzzle words are Sympathetic, Filet of Sole, Mysterious Stranger, Elephantine and Music.
How the Mighty Have Fallen - Part VI
Part I
Part II
Part III
Part IV
Part V
It didn’t take Pandora long to realize that this poor fella she was talking to was a manic depressive. Of course this was nothing knew to her as she tended to attract nutters. But, he seemed like such a gentle man and he knew the town so well that she thought he might be handy to have around.
Vader, on the other hand couldn’t believe what a sap this chick was. “These girls fall for the pathetic act so fast.” He thought to himself. “It’s almost unfair really.” Sometimes he actually found himself feeling a bit guilty at the way he took advantage of young girl’s sympathetic nature. But, not that guilty.
“Hey,” Vader suddenly said, “would you like to go somewhere else? Maybe someplace where the music isn’t so loud? Maybe even get something to eat?”
Pandora quickly answered that she was starving and that sounded like a brilliant idea to her.
“Great!” Exclaimed The Dark Lord “There is a great seafood restaurant just down the street. It’s name is Puget Sound and they serve the best filet of sole I’ve ever had anywhere.”
Pandora agreed and Vader stood up and held his hand out to help her out of the booth. Pandora wasn’t sure what this mysterious stranger was up to, but she knew she needed to slow down on the drinking. Her thinking had become fragmentary and she didn’t want to get into any trouble.
As they were walking Vader attempted again to get Pandora to talk about this person she came to town to look for. But, she was being very secretive about the whole thing. The only thing that she would say about it was that is was so important that she gave up great tickets to see The Color Purple to fly out here. “Fine,” Vader thought to himself, “I will get all the information I need from her one way or another.”
Vader was sure that since “operation face melt” was probably about to be a success he could call on what was left of his once elephantine powers and deal with this ditz.
Vegas is a different kind of place. Everyone always seems to be in perpetual motion. If you’re not careful you will feel like you’ve spend the entire day working out on the parallel bars and they left you bruised and battered. Back home now in Wisconsin and spending time around her family, Tiffany was finally beginning to realize just how much of her soul that city had sucked from her. She was sitting out on the front porch while drinking some sweat tea and trying to come up with a way that she could express her deep gratitude to everyone who has been so loving to her since she showed up out of the blue when she suddenly heard her mother screaming upstairs.
Tiffany jumped up so fast she knocked over her glass and the tea spilled all over the porch. But, she didn’t notice as the screen door had already slammed behind her and she was racing up the stairs towards her shrieking mother.
You know how this all works. Raven gives us the words and we make up the stories. And I’m still going with my Darth Vader in Vegas story.
So this weeks Big Wordzzle words are Handy, Operation, Gratitude, Parallel Bars, The Color Purple, Manic Depressive, Puget Sound, Fragmentary, Perpetual Motion and Secretive.
And the Mini Wordzzle words are Sympathetic, Filet of Sole, Mysterious Stranger, Elephantine and Music.
How the Mighty Have Fallen - Part VI
Part I
Part II
Part III
Part IV
Part V
It didn’t take Pandora long to realize that this poor fella she was talking to was a manic depressive. Of course this was nothing knew to her as she tended to attract nutters. But, he seemed like such a gentle man and he knew the town so well that she thought he might be handy to have around.
Vader, on the other hand couldn’t believe what a sap this chick was. “These girls fall for the pathetic act so fast.” He thought to himself. “It’s almost unfair really.” Sometimes he actually found himself feeling a bit guilty at the way he took advantage of young girl’s sympathetic nature. But, not that guilty.
“Hey,” Vader suddenly said, “would you like to go somewhere else? Maybe someplace where the music isn’t so loud? Maybe even get something to eat?”
Pandora quickly answered that she was starving and that sounded like a brilliant idea to her.
“Great!” Exclaimed The Dark Lord “There is a great seafood restaurant just down the street. It’s name is Puget Sound and they serve the best filet of sole I’ve ever had anywhere.”
Pandora agreed and Vader stood up and held his hand out to help her out of the booth. Pandora wasn’t sure what this mysterious stranger was up to, but she knew she needed to slow down on the drinking. Her thinking had become fragmentary and she didn’t want to get into any trouble.
As they were walking Vader attempted again to get Pandora to talk about this person she came to town to look for. But, she was being very secretive about the whole thing. The only thing that she would say about it was that is was so important that she gave up great tickets to see The Color Purple to fly out here. “Fine,” Vader thought to himself, “I will get all the information I need from her one way or another.”
Vader was sure that since “operation face melt” was probably about to be a success he could call on what was left of his once elephantine powers and deal with this ditz.
Vegas is a different kind of place. Everyone always seems to be in perpetual motion. If you’re not careful you will feel like you’ve spend the entire day working out on the parallel bars and they left you bruised and battered. Back home now in Wisconsin and spending time around her family, Tiffany was finally beginning to realize just how much of her soul that city had sucked from her. She was sitting out on the front porch while drinking some sweat tea and trying to come up with a way that she could express her deep gratitude to everyone who has been so loving to her since she showed up out of the blue when she suddenly heard her mother screaming upstairs.
Tiffany jumped up so fast she knocked over her glass and the tea spilled all over the porch. But, she didn’t notice as the screen door had already slammed behind her and she was racing up the stairs towards her shrieking mother.
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