Does Christina Aguilera Hate America?

I never knew that Christina Aguilera hated America until this week. Apparently the most unforgivable thing anyone can do is flub the words to the National Anthem. No matter how many times that person has done the Anthem before, at NBA All-Star games, MBL playoff games, NFL playoff games etc, if they get it wrong once they will be trashed non-stop for several days afterwords. Seriously people, give it a rest. Christina Aguilera got the words wrong. She didn't go to the Middle East and declare herself a supporter of Al Qaeda or rape and murder a little baby or something. Give it a fucking rest.

I mean, I realize that as super-duper uber patriotic real Americans we must admonish her and demand that she be punished in some measurable way by society for such an outrageous mistake. But, I think just going on and on and on and on about it is more than enough.

A recent poll found that 26% of Americans don't know who we won our independence from during the Revolutionary War. I'm betting that 99% of THOSE people are the ones screaming the loudest about Aguilera's unfortunate mistake.

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Speaking of the NFL, it's looking like it's very possible that they are going to build on the most watched Super Bowl in history and the most watched regular season in the league's history by having a lockout. I'm sure our corporate media will be front and center doing all they can to help the owners out during this work stoppage. Hell, they might even try to call it a “strike” and pretend that the players have walked out instead of pointing out that it's the owners who are threatening to lock the players out.

Anyway, I think there's one very important thing that the players need to get in the CBA agreement. The NFL needs to bring back the end zone celebration after touchdowns. It's a better game when players can dance and even do a little organized group celebration with their teammates after a TD. Bring back the humanness, will ya? I'm not talking about running around and acting like an idiot after making a routine first down catch or run. I'm simply talking about celebrating after TDs.

Oh and great job by the league and the networks to so brilliantly convince people that the ban on end zone celebrations is all about political correctness. It's not. It's about the league and networks not wanting more delays and needing more time for commercials AND about all the old, white fuddy duddies who run both the NFL and the networks who are outraged at seeing black people celebrate on the field.

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Finally, there were about 400 fans who had tickets to the Super Bowl, but no seats due to a temporary seating construction screw up. The NFL brought those fans into the stadium and they were able to watch the game there on big TVs. They were also refunded THREE TIMES the face value of their tickets. Then they were allowed to on the field after the game. Something even big time corporate types didn't get to do. AAAAAAAAAND they were give free tickets and lodging at next year's Super Bowl.

As you would expect, some of these people are throwing the biggest whiniest fit of entitlement ever. Fuck these people. The NFL has done everything that can be done and more, and some of these people are talking about suing? I wish the NFL would rescind their offers for triple the ticket price and free tickets and lodging next year for these crybabies. I just can't stand people like this. And I bet THEY'RE still bitching about Christina too.

Oh, one other thing though. You may continue to trash the Black Eyed Peas for their terrible halftime show. That's fine.

Not So Great Ice Storm of Death ...

So we appear to have survived the Great Ice Storm of Death™ here in Redneckville. Not without a lot of panic and chaos all over town to begin with though. In a manner that didn't remind us of cable news fear mongers at all, the local weathermen and women told us that this would be the worst winter storm in the history of the world!

Ice! Blizzards! High winds! Power outages! Wrath of God shit!

Well, it was pretty bad. And kind of bizarre. At 9 am it was raining. Hard. About a half out later everything was frozen up solid and it was sleeting. Then it rained again. Then sleet. Then blizzard like conditions. Then the sun came out. Then round two of the blizzard with VERY high winds. Then the sun came back out. All before 3 pm.

But, in the end, we didn't get the nearly 12 inches of snow they had feared. We got a couple of inches of ice and on top of it a couple more inches of snow. Maybe we got more snow. It's hard to tell because of the winds and the drifts, but the drifts weren't more than 8” deep, so we couldn't have gotten that much snow. I guess.

Anyway, this is what it looked like at the it's worst...

And this is what the entry looked like today...

Even the flag froze...

I talked to one dude who had gotten out and he said it was (please use your best redneck accent here) “just awful” in town. Said he slid all over everywhere and most of the town was shut down. And it will be again tomorrow. And quite possibly Friday.

Yeah, I know many places got it much worse. They always do. One of the givens of the internet is that no matter what you're talking about, it's much better or worse somewhere else. And people in those locals will tell you.

Got ice and snow? Someone will be by to say “Oh yeah, we got 30 inches of snow!!”

It's only 10 degrees? Someone will point out that it's MINUS 50 where they live!

Beautiful 70 degrees? It's a perfect 84 at the beach where someone else is.

So, even though it was OMG SO MUCH WORSE in other places. It was, in fact, pretty shitty here too. But, at least we didn't lose power and I didn't have to get out and take any chances. And by “take any chances” I mean worry about some stupid redneck in a sky blue 1977 drop-top Cadillac thinking he can drive on several inches of solid ice the same way he would on dry roads. So, it's all good.

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In other news it's just about that time of the week again! Thursday night at 11 pm EST will be yet another crap epic episode of “I'm With Stupid.” This week Matt-Man and I are throwing a Super Bowl Extravaganza! We're talking food and refreshments that you can serve at your Super Bowl party, along with previewing the game itself. We'll have a live remote from Marty Martstein from Dallas Fort Worth North Texas and, since we're talking NFL, Nipsey Russell will be there too! In addition to that, Guy Ahnyurdyck will call in from Egypt to let us know what is going on there. All this a lots more .. well, maybe not “lots” because we're going to 30 minutes this week in accordance with BTR's new rules.

Anyway, it'll be a GREAT time, so come on by and listen or listen in archives if you get the chance. Don't worry, I'm not keeping track of who does and doesn't listen so I'll know who to get payback against when I'm rich and famous. Well, not a formal, written list anyway.

I'm kidding! I'm kidding! I kid because I love.

BTW, you can now subscribe to “I'm With Stupid” in iTunes!!! How exciting is that? Here ya go:

http://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/im-with-stupid-blog-talk-radio/id417284719

Anyway, after our Super Bowl Extravaganza on “I'm With Stupid” I'll be back here on Friday with my own Super Bowl Party much like what I did last year in my Super Bowl preview.

Super Bowl Hangover

Hangovers come in many forms. Some hangovers are from drinking the entire case of Bud Lite behind the dumpster in the Burger King parking lot. Others originate from 3 plates of salty meatballs, chicken wings, chili, 4 variations of taco dip, and 5 beers. While others witnessed the end of the 2008-09 football season.

As Super Bowls go, this one was pretty good. I expected a blowout. The Cardinals actually kept it interesting throughout the game and even gave us some false excitement with about 2:30 to go in the 4th quarter as Larry Fitzgerald blasted down the field and scored a touchdown putting the Cards on top of the Steelers. But, alas, Ben Hamgburger pulled another touchdown pass out of his sphincter and plopped it down in front of our faces that was more offensive than Janet Jackson's left breast.

And that wasn't all the excitement. Apparently, some fans in Phoenix got to enjoy 10 seconds of porn instead of football (a fair trade if you ask me). Comcast and station KVOA are investigating how this could have happened. Let me help - a) deviant employee or b) a hacker with a great sense of humor. Are you really investigating or are you consulting your lawyers about the ramifications from the FCC?

So now that the Super Bowl is over, Pittsburgh fans can rest those yellow scary washcloths and start looking for a job again. Arizona fans can go back to their depression and desert smog. And the rest of us can go about hating the Steelers.

And for those non-sports fans, they can stop pretending they know what's going on. "I heard that Brett Favre kicked a homerun into the goal!" You know who you are. Don't pretend you know all about football. If you don't know a bootleg from a flee-flicker from a quick hitch, you're going to stick out like an honest politician on the Baltimore City Council.

Quasi-sports fans can pretend that they are interested in the upcoming baseball season. Others will begin watching the NCAA basketball season as March Madness soon approaches. No one really gives a sheet about the NBA. 5 of us will watch hockey. Women's volleyball, anyone?

And the football addicts will agitatingly hunker in their chair, shaking with anticipation for the new season to start. They claim that they are hard-core fans, driving around in their purple campers and buses, wearing make-up, feathers, beads, and camouflage. But I say they are clowns who have no life outside of football. I bet most couldn't provide their children's middle names.

So as that empty part of your life begins, go play with your kids. Take your wife to dinner and a movie. Make that to-do list. Because before you know it, it'll be time for football again.