Actually, I wonder when the last time I posted three straight days was. And I wonder what the longest streak of consecutive days of posting on this blog is. I bet it’s six. Hmmm … maybe I should try to break that record. I wonder if I could do that for Lent? You know, instead of giving stuff up I will commit to posting every day. I’ll give up NOT posting everyday if it makes the purists feel any better. We’ll see.
So, I guess you’ve all seen these stupid AT&T commercials with Luke Wilson, the least talented of the Wilson brothers*? The one I hate the most is the one where he’s sitting there and somebody calls him needing the capital of Peru. Luke quickly using the cool feature of being able to surf the net while talking on the cell phone that AT&T has and tells his friend “Lima!” The friend then shouts out “LIMA” and wins a million dollars on some “Who Wants to be a Millionaire” type game show.
My first reaction to that is that Luke must really be a freaking moron if he had to look the capital of Peru up. Yeah, I know that not everyone watches “Jeopardy” everyday, so maybe you’re not all up on your World Capitals. But, Lima, Peru is an easy one.
Then, a little later I see that commercial again and it suddenly hits me that there’s no way the million dollar question could be THAT easy. I mean come on, the million dollar question should be more like “How many points would antidisestablishmentarianism starting on the top right of a standard Scrabble board and going down be worth?” Or something like that.
Of course this reminds me of “Slumdog Millionaire” where the final question gave both Athos and Porthos and ask who the OTHER Three Musketeer was. When I was watching this I immediately realized that many people would quickly yell out d’Artangnan without thinking. So, of course I’m yelling “Aramis! Aramis!” and things like “Don’t say d’Artangnan dude, everyone falls for that.” Then I realized it was movie.
But, afterwards I had the same reaction that I had to the AT&T commercials. That was way too easy a question for the million dollars. Did they really think we would fall for that. What a stupid movie. I can’t believe I sat through the whole thing only for the final question to be that easy.
Then, I wondered if maybe I had missed the point of the movie. So I thought about it and realized that the hole point of the movie was that that dude would go through all kinds of shit just for a shot at Freida Pinto…
Then it all made sense.
*I’m not entirely sure where Luke Wilson falls on the talent scale. I guess he would be more talented than Megan Fox and Miley Cyrus, but still way behind both Cosette and Luca. I probably should work on this talent scale thing a little bit.
The first thing I would have to do is decide if I want talent scales for “Music” “Acting” “Writing” and maybe “Athletics” and if I want separate talent scales for men and women. And a special one for animals, I guess. Or do I want to just put them all on one big “Celebrity Talent Scale.”
Then I would have to decide who goes on top and who goes on bottom and then fill in from there. Maybe it would be easy to find the person who should be in the middle. You know, someone who epitomizes averageness. Maybe Ashton Kutcher? Obviously this is going to be pretty subjective. But, then all I would really have to do is rate everyone as “above average talent” or “below average talent.” That would certainly be easier than saying someone has “Meryl Streep level talent” or someone is in the “George Clooney category of coolness and talent combination.” Oh hell, that’s right. There might have to be scales for coolness and lameness and hotness too. And combinations of talent and coolness and lameness and hotness. Way too complicated if you ask me.
Yeah, I’ll have to think this over.
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