Dear Wesley Clark,

You may remember that not too long ago I put myself out there and made a couple of predictions as to whom McCain and Obama would pick as their running mates. And, you might remember that I picked you sir, Gen. Wesley Clark, as Obama's VEEP. I would link to that old post, but now that we know you aren't going to be Obama's pick I've deleted it. HA. I'm kidding .. here it is.

Anyway, not only has Obama not followed my brillaint and insightful advice, you apparently aren't even invited to the Dem Convention! How rude! I would like to say that Obama probably has a good reason for this, but I'm not so sure about that.

I do admire how you are playing the role of good (political) soldier and saying that you have a committment already that week. Seems you're gonna be in Milan on bidness. But, I'm almost certain that if Obama had wanted you to speak, the bidness could have been put off to a later time.

I have to say I kind of identify with you here. I know just what it's like not to get invited to the big parties. It's happened to me a few times too. Especially back in the day in college.

It was always a pain too. There would be a big party going on that all the cool kids were talking about all week long that I wasn't invited to. Then somebody would ask me "Hey, you're going to the party Saturday, right?" and I'd be like "Nooo .. I .. uh ... er .. uh already had another party to go to man." And then they'd be like "Bummer dude, it's going to be epic!"

Notice I was at least clever enough to not say "I have a date," cause they would know I was bullshitting then.

Then I'd end in somebody's room palying cards and watching a movie (maybe porn) and drinking beer that night. Then I would purposely not go down to the cafeteria for lunch on Sunday cause I didn't want to hear everyone talking about the party.

How sad is that?

At least that "there's another party going on" excuse worked in college. I lived in such a small town in high school that everyone knew all of the parties that were going on. Of course, nobody ever actually asked if I was going to any of them anyway, cause they knew better.

Anyway, I'm feeling ya Wes. I know what it's like to miss the big parties. After a while you kinda get used to it, but honestly it will always stay with you. Oh sure, you might not be as bitter about it as I am, but it will always sting a little. At least "business in Milan" is a pretty good-sounding excuse. I mean, Milan is cool. And there might be supermodels there! That's impressive. So don't feel so down about it man.

And, since I was the one pimping you for the VEEP slot, I really believe you should take me to Milan with you. Just an idea. Just throwing it out there.

And while we're there maybe we could call up somebody fun to hang out with. Somebody like .. oh IDK, maybe ... Monica Bellucci?


Yeah, that would show those democrats! They'll be stuck in freaking Denver and we'll be partying in Milan with Monica. Whadda say man? Let's do it!