lately!

i've been really frustrated, lately. i've been getting really ticked off easily, lately. i've been getting easily emotional, lately. i've been entirely out of it, lately. oh my goodness world, i think i'm in an another strange emo phase!

today i did horrible on my debate in literature. i don't want to go into details, because it was just that bad! it was so embarassing and it was all my fault. i swear, there just must be something wrong with class. i mean, i've done pretty well with a lot of my presentations throughout the year in other classes-- but every single presentation i've had to do in that class has just been a failure! really, i wish all we ever had to do in there was just to write essays. then i'd have an A! and i wouldn't have to worry so much anymore.

i totally agree with ck's post below about college... but i know that since everyone's competitive about it, even if at this moment i'm saying to myself its okay to not get into a UC, i know that that's what i'm going to be striving for, and if i dont get in i will simply be crushed. like today. with my debate. the debate was just all bad. so humiliating. i feel like such a failure! i let myself down, and it sucks. it was like a low-blow to maa face. yeah, i'm a little crushed about it. je suis un petit triste. i feel like giving up even more now. i dont know, i'm just "emo" right now and very vulnerable, so please be nice to me for a while.

i can't think of anything that can make me happy. or completely happy. i'm just feeeling very blaaah right now. stupid school. STUPID SCHOOOL!

ahhhhhhsdg. too many problems in the world. i can't even keep up with my own problems! how can i keep up with problems in the world right now. ahhhhhh. i need to get myself togetherrr!

i miss this friend i have in canada named Mayon. haha. that silly guy. i havent been on aim in forever, and therefore i havent talked to him in forever!

i want go shopping. but i have no money. it's okay though, i don't NEED to go shopping. everybody's freaking out about money, and really, i'm okay with everything i've got. clothes have actually kinda drifted out of my mind.

okay i need to make myself a list of important things to do! that i keep forgetting to do. maybe it'll help.

THINGS TO DO BEFORE THE END OF APRIL!

1. Study for AP Physics Test
2. Read the SATs Book
3. DO PRE-CALCULUS HOMEWORK!
4. Finish freaking "ON THE ROAD" so you can truly complete your junior project!
5. Make Robyn a phone case for her Voyager.
6. Plan the Summer trip
7. If you cannot plan the Summer trip, ask someone else to plan it.
8. Call RAINBOWS studio to schedule a family picture this weekend.
9. CALL CK!
10. SLEEP!
11. Be nicer to siblings and parents and family and people!
12. Chill out, pleasee.
13. Do your homework in general.

whoever came up with these glasses? and how did kanye rocking them make them so big? ahh it doesnt matter, because i actually wouldn't mind getting my hands on one of them. that'd make me happy actually! (so nvm, i guess materialism does fix everything!)

^__^ P-A-C-H-I-A!