A Small History of Ratings Flip-Flops

Die Hard switched ratings. That constitutes a betrayal in my book. That’s the way a staunch Democrat would look at it if his candidate switched mid-stream to the Republican side, or vice versa. In the Die Hard series, Bruce Willis plays John McClane. In the fourth entry in the series, Live Free or Die Hard, just call him Benedict Arnold.

Die Hard 1, 2 and 3 were all rated R, and rightfully so. In 1, McClane blows a guy’s kneecaps out as raspberry jelly shoots from the wounds. In 2, scaffolding crushes a man’s head like a grape, and later a man is sucked into a jet engine. In 3, McClane paints the interior of an elevator a nice shade of red, and later a man is ripped in two by a stray crane cable. In all of them we are given a great movie line upon the disposal of a bad guy: “Yippee-ki-yay …” you can imagine the rest. Pretty classic action-movie stuff.

Fast forward. Present day. Live Free or Die Hard. Gunshot wounds no longer bleed. Heads no longer come off or pop or crush or split. Bad guy’s no longer curse or execute innocent people (poor Joe Takagi) to prove a point. And John McClane no longer says his famous catch phrase. Sure, he says 75 percent of it, but a gunshot cracks over the important parts, those four deliciously vile syllables.

The reason for the shift in ratings — Live Free or Die Hard is PG-13 — can only be attributed to money. Studio bosses saw a chance to bring in X amount of people with an R-rated movie, and X² with a PG-13-rated movie, which doesn’t require a parent or guardian buying the ticket. So, although McClane is an adult’s action hero, he’s written here for a teen crowd. It would be better if the character were just killed off rather than be censored and removed of his powers. And yes, the F-word and the ability to explode heads is a power in movies. Don't blame the Motion Picture Association of America ratings board. They just rated what they were given, and Die Hard's makers decided to give them PG-13 material. Shame on you the keepers of John McClane's legacy.

Here is a brief look at some other franchises that have switched ratings mid-series:

• Mad Max — Mel Gibson’s Max Rockatansky character went from violent (Mad Max) to really violent (Road Warrior) to totally wimpy (Mad Max Beyond Thunderdome). The whisper of a kitten was mightier, not to mention more interesting. The R-rated franchise decided to geek itself out of the picture with an overproduced costume picture with one cool set (the Thunderdome) that suddenly prescribed to PG-13 values. And it had Tina Turner; what’s she got to do with it?

• Crocodile Dundee — G’bye PG-13 rating. G’day PG. That’s what the series did with the third entry, Crocodile Dundee in Los Angeles, an abysmal second sequel 13 years after the first sequel. This time ol’ Mick Dundee takes his joey along. The addition of a kid meant the jokes were tamer and the action not nearly as intense. Remember in the first film when he ruined a guy’s coke and then grabbed a transsexual’s balls? Those days are long gone here, mate.

• Scary Movies — The Scary Movie franchise represents the extinction of the quality spoof. Its downfall: the series resorted to mocking individual films — Scream then Signs — rather than film movements or genres. (The last real spoof was Hot Shots! Part Deux) The first two movies were raunchy R-rated sex comedies; in the first one a man is impaled in the ear by a penis. The series then left the hands of the Wayans Brothers and plopped into David Zucker’s lap. Zucker, of course, directed Airplane! He toned down the sex and drug use and made a tame PG-13 comedy.

• Major League — Baseball needed a movie like Major League. Notice I said movie, singular, and not movies, plural. The R-rated first film was rude and crude, and I vaguely recall a slow reveal of a life-sized nude picture of the team’s owner. And remember Dennis Haysbert (24’s President Palmer) chastising Jobu, his locker idol? The two sequels that followed it were not nearly as funny, or offensive. By the time the third film came around in 1998 most of the original cast — Charlie Sheen, Rene Russo, Tom Berenger and coach James Gammon — had all been traded. The lower ratings of the second and third pictures — PG and PG-13 respectively — probably had no real effect on the overall popularity of the film. The real culprit: all the material had been mined in the first one.

• Harry Potter — The whole series is based on a children’s books, so you’d think it would all stay PG, but think again you dumb muggle (don’t worry, I’m one too). Instead Warner Bros. bumped the fourth and fifth movies — Goblet of Fire Order of the Phoenix — up to PG-13, proving that the stories were maturing with the audience. The new PG-13 rating didn’t provide any sex (although one kiss) or toilet humor, it did allow filmmakers to get a little creepier with the effects. For tiny children, the new rating was downright scary. If the rating arc were to continue, the last two films would have to be rated R. Unlikely.

• Star Wars Prequels — Episode I: The Phantom Menace and Episode II: Attack of the Clones had their fair share of action, mayhem and overall mischief, but still they landed a PG. Tear an arm off a robot and the ratings board doesn’t even whimper. Tear an arm off a Jedi and they’ll likely give you a PG-13, which is exactly what happened with Episode III: Revenge of the Sith. Besides some violent sequences with the Jedi’s untimely demise and Anakin’s transformation into Darth Vader, the film is largely a PG movie except for the gloomy cloud that strikes a dark cast over the entire story.

• Technicalities — Several films within a series have had their ratings altered only because of the invention of the PG-13 rating. For instance, Raiders of the Lost Ark was PG, but the later Indiana Jones films were PG-13 — Temple of Doom supposedly caused the introduction of the rating. Other film series with similar ratings changes include Rocky, Jaws and Poltergeist.

• True movies — I enjoy movies that stay true to what they are, be it G-rated or R-rated material. Rambo has never compromised his violence, nor has Vito Corleone with The Godfather. The taming of John McClane should go down in action-movie history as one of the genre’s lowest moments. The only thing sadder is Tony Soprano on A&E without an F-word to stand on.